The Dried Fruit Debacle

My Naturopath suggested dried fruit for a work time snack (as I snack A LOT at work).  In my committed, organic, gluten free, sugar free mind - I headed to Costco while in Halifax cheering on Team PEI Synchro (YAY team!) to purchase some bulk organic treats.  I came across a fruit and nut medley and in my naive mind I thought "dried fruit is dried fruit no worries here..." and purchased a huge bag for $13 and change.  $250.00 later - I had purchased enough snacks for at least 2 months.  Gotta love Costco!

My first day back to work from my mini vacay I hoed into the dried fruit.  It was glorious, drops of heaven in my mouth, chewy goodness, enough salt on the peanuts, the best raisins I've ever tasted.  Next day at work, same thing however I decided to share the wealth (sharing means caring..:) ) with my coworker.  More for me, some for him - I was so pleased bragging how tasty the fruit was and that it is good for you.  Day 3 - I got Mike to try some and he was super pumped on how awesome it tasted.  I again took a sandwich bag to work and a bag for my coworker - mouth starting to get sore from the fruity goodness - I soldiered on and consumed another big bag of the sweet stuff.

I arrived home from work that night and was talking about the fruit and nut medley again (should have at this point realized there was a problem) to Mike and at this point he says "it just can't be natural it tastes TOO good!".  Brushing him off in denial - I said - "Nope, it's ALL good!" and we went about our bizness.  About 15mins later, second guessing myself I went and checked the bag for the ingredients....


NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!   I screamed.  It's FULL of sugar!!!   Mike says "I knew it!"

As I read through the ingredients, every piece of fruit had SUGAR as the second ingredient.....  I had been eating fake sugar (which I've been off since January 3rd) for 3 days in a row.  I had consumed a 1/4 of the bag and enjoyed every minute of it.

I immediately was overcome with emotion, tears welling up, and I was soooo disappointed in myself for not checking the ingredient list (as I do with all the foods I eat now) but realized it was an honest mistake.  I didn't mean to eat the 'forbidden' foods but it does go to show that the sugar has a hold on me.   The bingeing/self control went out the window, yet again, and I was a victim to the sweetness.

It's now gone out of the house and I can say I'm happy.  The bag was staring me down day after day taunting me but I didn't give in.  This is my life.  Every meal is a choice and test of will - it's exhausting.